When I wrote about the Personal Training Giveaway, I mentioned a series on Weight Loss. I also admitted I’ve been avoiding this topic.
One evening at the dinner table last fall, my son announced they were discussing dieting in Health Class all week. He likes to participate in class discussion. I could only imagine what he said.
Tell me you didn’t raise your hand and say, “My mom has tried every diet out there!”
“No, I didn’t say that,” he replied. “But some other kid did!” I knew better.
“Ok, it WAS me.” he admitted.
My family has endured a number of my diets over the last years. You may look at pictures here on the blog and think…”Well, she’s not a size 0, but why is she always dieting?” Most of my life I never had to diet and could eat anything I wanted. I didn’t gain much weight with my kids and I lost it quickly both times. The second time was a little harder and I had to exercise a bit (what a concept). Then things started to change.
I’ve tried Atkins, South Beach, Jenny Craig, LA Weight Loss, Weight Watchers, Fat Flush Plan, Advocare, and some diet with pills that contained ephedrine before it was banned. Oh, and don’t let me forget the Lemonade Diet (cleanse) I’ve counted calories, grams of fiber and carbs. I’ve gone gluten free. I went through the step aerobics phase, worked with personal trainers, took up jogging, tried Pilates and spinning. Extensive reading on the weight loss topic only added to my frustration at times.
Most people tell me I look fine. The bottom line: I’ve learned to hide it well over the years. It honestly is one of the reasons I knew I would be a good stylist. I’m a master at hiding the flaws-especially around the middle. Please let me emphasize that I’m not trying to get back to High School or College weight. I’ve even given up weighing what I did before I had children. I have a goal that is a healthy weight for my height and AGE (this matters now). I honestly would be more than happy at this weight, but I’m a good 25 lbs away.
Before I share any more about my own medical journey, let’s talk about you.
Every woman I know wants to lose weight. It’s estimated that only 1% of women are happy with their bodies. I have very thin women come into the boutique where I work and complain about their “muffin top” and the fact that they can pinch a half inch of fat around their middle. Instead of singing the blues about myself, I validate their concerns by saying that I understand. While I might not be relating on the very same level, almost EVERY WOMAN compares herself to how she USED to be. It’s very easy to get stuck on that. The woman that has only 5 pounds to lose or whose rock hard abs aren’t quite the same is just as upset and frustrated as those of us who have to lose 20 pounds or more. It’s all relative to your individual situation.
The next time your very thin friend complains about her weight, I want you to listen and understand. Those few pounds are just as irritating to her as your 20 are to you. By the same token, if you are the woman complaining about an extra inch around your middle to the woman who has 50+ to lose, choose your words carefully.
It may be difficult to share your own personal struggles with weight in a blog comment, but I welcome them if you are willing to share. There is more coming on this topic. If there is an area you’d like me to cover, let me know.
While I can not say I have tried all those different diets I can say that I have watched my friends do it only to gain the weight back and more. I decided I was not into that yo yo effect and would just remain as I was finding ways to hide the flaws all the while not feeling as good about myself and not noticing how much it was affecting my sleep and energy level. Until I watched a friend for 2 years who did Take Shape For Life, she lost the weight and kept it off. I got in touch with her last May and both my husband and I went on the program. I lost 40 lbs in 12 weeks during the weight loss phase and during transition I lost an additional 16 lbs. All this with no pills, no gym membership and eating every 2-3 hours. My husband lost 60 lbs and was off his type 2 diabetic meds after one week on the program. We became health coaches and I am now supporting 7 clients as they are on their journey to optimal health. This is a wonderful program with quick and consistant results, and the best part is sharing it with others like me who thought there was nothing out there that really works. I am now having a blast re-buying my clothes at a size I never would have dreamed I could be !!!
I am SOO happy for you Tami! You’re going to be hearing how it is all about choice and how one program works for one person, but maybe not for another. So glad you found what works for YOU!!
Wow! You hit the nail on the head. I love your reflection of saying “I understand” when talking to someone about their weight. Coming from someone who feels like they have to explain why they are not happy with their weight, and therefore feel guilty about not being happy (is there a therapist in the house!). Oh wait, maybe that is you! I can not wait to hear what else you have to say about this! Love, love , love your blog!
THANKS Cathy! It wasn’t that many years ago that I probably rolled my eyes when you told me you needed to lose weight. From what I said above, I learned a few things along the way. I too get tired of people saying, “you look fine, you look fine!”The bottom line is I’m not at completely happy OR healthy. At the same time, women need to SET REALISTIC goals and learn to embrace that they may not look like they did in high school. More to come on that–when to let go and just embrace where you are.
Karen–I absolutely agree with you about the weight thing being relative and such an individual issue. I made a personal decision after being a thin person for years and then gaining weight that I would never go on a diet. It always seemed to be a temporary fix and I watched too many people ride the diet roller coaster. I knew I needed to make eating and lifestyle changes. “Fit by Forty” was my goal and I achieved it and lost 30 pounds and felt great. Could never imagine that I would gain it all back. Now I seem to be on the road to “Fat by Fifty” which is not really my new goal. Can I blame my thyroid? I am taking meds. I don’t want to look like I did in high school (yikes) but I know I need to make healthier choices without depriving myself. Okay, I’m in danger of this being longer than your post so I’ll stop now and will “weigh in” again later.
Cathy K–I am rolling my eyes right now because you have always looked GREAT! I’ll work on having some empathy for you (tee hee)!
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